You know those days when you’re just sitting there, dwelling over anything and everything. the good things you’ve done, the bad things you’ve done, the people you hurt, the people you’ve been there for, the words you said, the words you wish you didn’t say. yesterday I had probably one of the largest wake up calls I’ve had since the beginning of first semester at A&M. I’ve just been strolling through this life like it’s no big deal, when in reality, I’m on this earth for a reason. I haven’t been glorifying the Lord at all. Not with my words, actions, or thoughts, and I am absolutely guilty and heartbroken from it. In my head and in my heart I know I have done wrong yet I do nothing to change. Yesterday when what seemed like the world was crashing down, I turned off the TV, put on my Matt Redman pandora playlist, closed my eyes, wrote everything I was feeling, and just cried out to the Lord. I had been needing to do this for about 2 weeks now, but just never did. Yesterday was extremely hard, convicting, but so so needed. I think with girls my age its so easy to get caught in the patterns of this world…the constant need to be wanted/loved by a boy, the desire to look a certain way, etc etc etc. yet what we need to realize is that we should be searching for beauty through our father, Jesus Christ. That is the only way we can truly enthrall others around us. Loving God makes us love others and not fall short over and over again. It’s amazing what 2 hours with the Lord can do. When you just sit, confess, and listen. I have another semester coming up and I can either make it beautiful or go back to how things were the past two weeks. I want to be happy, and joyous, and full of life, and GLORIFYING. that word means so much to me. I know what it’s like to be drowned in the word of God, because first semester I was there and it was beautiful. I was happy and full of passion and joy for everything and everyone around me. I want that back.